We had a wonderful, full day, but by far the sweetest part was my baby boy falling asleep in my arms at the end of it all. So sleepy. Curled into my body, one fist to his temple, one hand resting gently on my lips. Yes, love, I'm still here. First looking around the room, then only staring up at my eyes, as his eyes blink slower and longer, until they are finally closed for good. His breaths gets deeper, and louder through his nose. His leg twitches, followed by the loud click-sucking of his pacifier until he calms again. I kiss him on the forehead, and he smells so good. He smells like HIM. My sweet baby.
I rise to put him in his bed, and he curls into me more, his eyes staying closed as I walk. I slowly lower him down, and he startles slightly. He arches back and wriggles himself into his new surroundings. The fingers that rested on my lips now reach out and rest on a bar of the crib. Yes, love, it's still there. His head pushes farther to the side, and his eyes slowly close again. I cover him to the neck with a soft, fuzzy blanket, and I can almost see his body relaxing under it, grateful.
I slowly leave the room, so incredibly grateful for the baby that cries, that fusses, that doesn't like anything you feed him, that shrieks when you don't let him carry around the Kcups, that still hasn't really said a word. So incredibly grateful. I don't want to forget a second.